Numbness & disconnection

Where some trauma responses are too much feeling, this one is too little — a flatness, emptiness, or disconnection from your emotions, your body, or the people around you. You might feel like you're going through the motions, watching life from behind glass, or unable to reach feelings you know are there. It's protection: when feeling was too dangerous or overwhelming, numbing it was how you survived.

• feeling flat, empty, or hollow
• distance from your body or surroundings
• going through the motions without being present
• difficulty feeling joy, connection, even sadness

• “I don't feel anything”
• “I'm just going through the motions”
• a sense of being separate from everyone
• wondering what's wrong with you for not feeling

When emotions were once too much to bear — or expressing them wasn't safe — the system learned to turn the volume down, sometimes all the way to off. Numbing protected you from pain you couldn't process then. The trouble is the dial doesn't only dim the hard feelings; it dims the good ones too, and it can stay down long after you're safe.

• forcing feeling, or judging yourself for the numbness
• filling the emptiness with things that numb further
• treating it as permanent (“this is just how I am”)

• gentle reconnection through the body and senses — texture, temperature, movement, slow attention to sensation
• small doses; the system numbed for a reason, so go slowly
• noticing tiny flickers of feeling without forcing more
• trauma-informed work to help feeling become safe again